Loneliness is an emotion difficult to describe unless you have experienced it yourself. Even though many people will feel alone at some point in their lives, many endure isolation for years without speaking about it. The reason this silence may vary and can include fear of criticism rejection, or a lack of understanding of what’s happening with them.

Not being able to feel accepted or that you belong in a group is very painful. One of the outcomes for the person experiencing this situation is isolation. Surprisingly “just in the United States about sixty-million people feel sufficiently isolated” according to John T. Cacioppo and William Patrick in their book “Loneliness.” This is not to be taken lightly, as social isolation has many consequences that impact our health and overall well-being.

If you are reading this blog for you or someone you know, understanding more about the topic will give you a more compassionate perspective. Here are 5 things to consider:

1.-Loneliness doesn’t mean a lack of social skills or friends                                     When a person feels lonely, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they lack the skills to make or have friends. In my experience, someone can be in a room entirely surrounded by friends and family and yet feel totally alone. Hence the feeling is not proportional to the number of people that someone may have around.

2.-Not all interactions are equal
Loneliness usually comes as a result of not feeling connected to ourselves and those around us. The way each of us experiences fulfilling connections has its own unique combination. It’s
essential to spend time identifying and knowing your own personal preferences. If you already have a clear idea of what those choices are, great! If not, start
getting curious about the types of people you like to be with and their characteristics; who do you enjoy talking to? Who do you trust? Which topics do you feel most passionate about, and who can you share them with? The more you understand yourself, the easier it will be to create relationships where you feel loved and appreciated.

3.-It takes courage to break a pattern
Sometimes the fear of being criticized, embarrassed, or rejected is far greater than the pain to stay quiet tolerating isolation. The downside of this approach is that it blocks your innate ability to create the relationships you so deeply desire by not making yourself available. It  takes courage to overcome a situation where you feel trapped. The clearer you get on what you want, the easier it’ll be to take little steps towards breaking a habitual behavior, allowing a new one to arise.

4.-Loneliness and solitude are not the same
Loneliness is a painful emotion that feels debilitating, draining, and uncomfortable, resulting from separation. Solitude, on the other hand, is when someone chooses to be by them-self on purpose. Even though the person is alone, they won’t feel lonely, but instead connected at a deep level with themselves and enjoying the moment.

5.-Know when it’s time to look for help
To handle loneliness appropriately is vital to know what’s causing it. Suppose you have recently changed jobs, for example. In this case, it’s a different situation than if you often feel lonely or isolate yourself due to fear or any limiting belief. If the latter is the case is recommended to work with a professional that can help to uncover the root cause and provide a guide that will ultimately facilitate healing and the space to create healthy habits that are satisfying.

There are many reasons why we can feel lonely in our lives. However, living a life where we are accepted, loved, and nourished is our right. If you often find yourself enduring the heaviness of loneliness for longer than necessary, keep in mind that the benefits of challenging your beliefs are greater than your current circumstance.